Reimagining the "Christian" Question

A simple way to reframe that tattered question so that it reshapes our thinking

We all do it. Well, at least most folks in my world do.

When we’re wondering about someone else’s faith, our reflex is to ask, “Is he or she a Christian?” The words just tumble out of our mouths without much thought. And if we’re not the one asking, we’ve probably had someone ask us— more times than we can count — “Do you think he is a Christian?”

And while it’s natural to be curious about someone’s faith, I’ve started to wonder… is that really the right question anymore? Was it ever? And if it’s not, could there be a better one — one that actually opens things up, makes us think, and maybe even brings a little inspiration to the conversation? I’d be up for that.

Why the Old Question Feels Off

Over the years, I’ve gotten increasingly uneasy with the “Is she a Christian?” question, for at least a couple of reasons.

First, it feels like I’m being asked to make a call about someone else’s relationship with God — and honestly, how would I know what’s happening deep within another person’s soul? That’s way above my pay grade.

Second, I’ve realized that we often mean completely different things when we use the word Christian. We’re using the same word, but we might be having a totally different conversation. Let me give an example.

When Words Don’t Line Up

When I hear, “Is he a Christian?”, I tend to interpret it through a behavioral lens. I hear: “Is this person living in the way of Jesus? Acting like Jesus? Following in his steps?” To me, the earliest Christians were known by how they lived — they were literally called people of the Way. So that’s the framework I use when I answer.

But the person asking might have something totally different in mind. They might be talking about religious affiliation (“Does she identify as a Christian?”), or maybe eternal destiny (“Is he saved?”). They’re not necessarily thinking about how someone lives, but rather what they claim to be or what their future holds.

So while we’re both using the same word — “Christian” — we might as well be speaking different languages. No wonder those conversations can get confusing.

A Thought Experiment

So here’s a little experiment I’d love to invite you into. It’s simple.

What if we just shelved the “Is she or he a Christian?” question — maybe for a season, maybe forever — and replaced it with a new one: “Does he or she remind you of Jesus?”

Okay, I know that might sound a little odd at first, but hang with me. Because when you flip the question like that, something beautiful happens.

You’re no longer sitting in the judge’s chair, deciding who’s “in” or “out.” You sidestep all the fuzzy confusion around what Christian even means these days. The question becomes personal and experiential — it’s now about how you see or experience someone’s presence in the world. And maybe most importantly, it turns the conversation from labels and boxes into something alive and dynamic: how Christ’s love and character are showing up — right here, right now — in ordinary human lives. Now that’s a conversation worth having!

A Different Kind of Seeing

This shift also changes how we see others. Instead of mentally sorting people into “Christian” or “not,” we simply look for traces of Christ’s presence — his kindness, his humility, his generosity — in one another and we enjoy a taste of goodness and grace whenever we see them.

That actually happened to me just the other night.

I was listening to a Ugandan leader named Moses tell his story. Against all odds, he helped 350 farmers start a coffee cooperative that crossed tribal and religious lines, cultivating not just really good coffee, but also bridge-building peace and sustainable livelihoods in his community.

As he spoke, I found myself thinking: he reminds me of Jesus.

It wasn’t an evaluation or a verdict — just a moment of recognition. His goodness carried a familiar fragrance. Something about his humility, his kindness, his love for others — it all pointed me back to Christ, and it warmed my heart. It was a gentle, somewhat unexpected experience of Christ’s presence.

And if someone were to ask me, “So, is Moses a Christian?”, I think I’d smile and say, “Well, he sure reminds me of Jesus.”